Stop Playing My Song!

I launch this blog with a list of songs not to play upon particular occasions.  Of course, the AHA research saying that a 103-beat/minute rhythm is ideal for hands-only CPR—then pointing out that it's the precise beat of both "Stayin' Alive" and Queen's "Another One Bites the Dust"—takes an easy gold medal in the Ironic Mismatch category.  Here are a few more:

Agnosticism:  "Don't Stop Believing"
Agoraphobia:  "Canada's Really Big"
Alcatraz:  "All Along the Watchtower"
Alcoholics Anonymous: "Give Me Three Steps"
Amnesia:  "Always Something There to Remind Me"
Arson Inquiries:  "We Didn't Start the Fire"
Brake Failure:  "Can't Slow Down"
Burger King:  "(That's The Way) I Like It"
Coffee:  "Don't Close Your Eyes"
Date with Shelob:  "Man Eater"
Hypothermia:  "Cold as Ice"
International Date Line:  "The Times, They Are A'Changing"
Jacques Cousteau:  "Friends in Low Places"
Leprosy:  "Touch Me, Babe"
Mormon Missionaries:  "Knocking on Heaven's Door"
Multiple Personalities:  "A Little Help From My Friends" 
Narcissism:  "Who Needs You, Baby?"
One Ring to Rule Them All:  "Ring of Fire"
Organized Crime:  "We Are Family"
Original Sin:  "Baby You're No Good"
Plumber's Crack:  "Bad Moon Rising"
Safecracking:  "Turn Turn Turn"
Skeptics Society:  "I'm a Believer"
Tennis:  "Gonna Have to Serve Somebody"
Tone Deafness:  "I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing"
Vampirism:  "I Died in Your Arms Tonight"

More to come, on various occasions without notice.